That's not my name

What most people don't know when they read my name is that I have two last names. It's treated like a name with a hyphen, just without the hyphen. My maiden name did not become my middle name. I just leave out my middle name and write only my first and last names. So officially, my name reads Jennifer Allyn Thompson Valdyke. But because most people don't want to know your middle name, and it's not wrong to just write your first and last, I simply write Jennifer Thompson Valdyke.

I throw people way off when I say aloud my name because they can't see it. So, they just think I have four names, two of them being middle names. To help them out a little bit I make sure to give a longer pause between my first name (then my middle) and say my last names without a pause so they can hear my names are supposed to be together.

I learned that changing your name is not easy in America. To me it makes sense to officially change one's name with the Social Security Administration otherwise I could have multiple identities floating around and that can be chaotic. It turns out that is not the case. I found out after trying the logical way that I was supposed to go to the DMV to show them that I was married and they would change my name. And then I could take that ID to the SSA and show them that my name was changed. That doesn't make sense to me that it was too easy to change your identity by showing a marriage certificate to the DMV to get a new ID card. I feel like that is too easy to cheat the system or escape the government. Because even though I changed my DMV according to the DMV and all the police that might pull me over, according to the United States Government, my name is still Jennifer Allyn Thompson, making my my "name change" really just a joke.

The funny part about the DMV is that they cannot make a name hyphenated or anything like an amalgamation of names for some reason I don't know. (I think they were misinformed because according  to their website, as long as I had my marriage application that has my desired married name, then they could make it that. The SSA told me that they needed the application in addition to the certificate to legally change my name, but that was not what their website said. I had to show up in person to find that out.) But since I did not want a hyphen, she saw no problem with just adding another name to the end of mine.

Additionally, when addressing a letter. It is incorrect to say "Mrs. Jennifer Thompson Valdyke." Since my last name is different from my husband's I would not be a "Mrs." I would be a "Ms." It is also incorrect to address it as "Mr. and Mrs. C. E. Valdyke" Because I'm not a Mrs. and he is not a Mrs., it doesn't make sense to write us a letter calling us by the wrong name or gender. If it is being addressed to both of us, it would be correct to formally address it as "Mr. C. E. Valdyke and Ms. Jennifer A. Thompson Valdyke."

Now that you know, please don't screw it up in the future; it really wil perturb me if you do. I will remember and just might "accidentally" call you by the wrong name.