Tuesday, April 28, 2015


Well, we are about to move across country to Monterey. More on that later, but right now I am going to talk the great Adventure that awaits!
So in our planning, we have decided to take a Northern route, because why go 3,000 miles when you can go almost 5,000!!!!
Now our route generally looks something a little like this:
Rockies vs Misty Mountains, Mt. Saint Helens vs Mt. Doom. What's the difference really.
But if you saw the movies the Lord of the Rings, it felt like it was actually kinda a short journey (way to go Peter Jackson), so in a little more historical context, I guess our route is more like this
So we are going to be AWESOME ADVENTURERERERERS (I didn't know when to stop, kinda like banananana...). Basically, starting in mid may, you can call me Marco Polo
Okay, you caught me. He went east. And actually, he may not have even traveled to China (BUT I BELIEVE IN NETFLIX!!!!!). We will be more like Louis and Clark...
WAIT, WAIT, I mean Lewis and Clark. LEWIS AND CLARK. Discover a new frontier, reach the Pacific. MANIFEST DESTINY! MANIFEST DESTINY!
Close enough.

I will now briefly describe the epic journey we have planned.
-Start in the seventh circle of hell that is central Florida.
-Head north to Zombie country aka central Georgia.
-Pass through country music country, while listening to anything but.
-Continue north through the desolation of corn fields (aka Mordor) that is Illinois and Iowa.
-Strike west across the waste land from Mad Max that is South Dakota.
-Pass through Ranger Rick and Yogi Bear land
-Eat some potatoes in Idaho
-Decide that beelining it to Monterey is a bad idea and go Northwest, AWAY FROM OUR DESITINATION
-Spend some time in the dreary, rainy, Northwest. There is a reason grunge was born here...
-Turn south and pass through the Forest Moon of Endor
-Continue south over LAVA FIELDS
-Pass through wine country... even though we don't drink any
-FINALLY reach our destination in Monterey CA.

Why are we taking this roundabout way to get to our destination (other than pure insanity). Well we want to visit some distant relatives
Family Reunion of the Strooband Clan
And see some amazing sites!
Biggest reason to go North
This means something
So it should be pretty awesome. And while our road trip should look and feel something like this.
Enjoy the fresh air and the great American landscape kids.
I imagine it will feel more like the following at times.
And like this at the worst of times
Takes place someplace in South Dakota. The guy on the pole is Gabe.
But it should be awesome. It is a great adventure. A quest. When I reach the bridge of death, I'll be able to answer the questions three.
My name is Evan Valdyke
I seek the Holy Grail (NPS)
African or European

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